Memorial Slay

Lloyd had it in his mind that this year was going to be the best Memorial Day ever. He was single and didn’t have a family to cook for, but nonetheless, he spent much of his meager savings on fireworks, meat, charcoal, and other various grilling holiday provisions. He did a little dance as he stood in line at the checkout counter waiting to be rung up. “Gonna be a good day, I take it?” asked the cashier. She was a gorgeous brunette of average height. Her smile seemed to radiate and brighten the store all on its own. Her name tag read “Shannon”.
“Definitely!” he said. “Might even be better if you chose to participate, yeah?”
She seemed to be shocked by the offer, but didn’t lose her smile. “Maybe. I get off at three, if that’s okay.” Lloyd was elated. She hadn’t actually confirmed wanting to join him, but it was a start. The customer in front of him, an older woman, slid her card while stealing a glance back at him. “Thank you, ma’am.” She said as she took her bags and receipt and walked out of the store. Shannon waved back at her and turned back to Lloyd. “Okay, so where’s this happening?” she asked as she began to ring up his groceries. Lloyd grinned. “My place. Not grilling til five, so you have plenty of time to get ready. That’s if you want to come by, of course.” Shannon continued checking him out. Lloyd had always considered himself a decent looking fellow. He was tall with sandy blond hair. He had a little pudge in the middle, but it wasn’t anything he considered out of control.
“242.38” Shannon had finished scanning his cart and announced the total. Lloyd slid his card.
“So, what’s it gonna be?” he asked with a smile.
She looked up at him from the register as the receipt printed. “Careful, I’m a man eater.” She said.
Lloyd chuckled, “C’mon. It’ll be fun.”
“Fine, I’ll bite. What’s the address?” Lloyd pulled a pen from his pocket and scribbled his home address on the back of his receipt. “Here you go. Don’t forget, five o’clock!” He winked at her as he pushed his cart away from the checkout station and towards the door. Shannon smiled big and pocketed the note. It’d been a while since she’d had barbecue.


Lloyd checked the clock. It was half past four. He didn’t have much time finish preparing for the grill out. He’d marinated all the meats; brisket, ribs, chicken. He’d even prepared kabobs for the occasion. Now he just needed to get the grill going and everything would flow perfectly.
He juggled a few of the pans of meat out the back door to the patio where the bag of charcoal and the grill sat cold and waiting for him. He was proud of his grill. He wasn't particularly experienced with grilling, but he always figured it couldn't hurt to put your best foot forward. He'd saved up a couple pay checks just to afford it and it was gonna be worth it. It had all the bells and whistles a charcoal griller could hope for, including a place to hold his beer while he flipped the meat and corn. He was ecstatic. Lloyd set the pans down on the table under the big umbrella and began filling the grill with charcoal. The dust of the briquettes flew up in a puff as they all tumbled into the burner reservoir. Lloyd coughed and wheezed. He could even taste it somewhat in his mouth. He didn't catch the lone briquette that ricocheted off the side of the reservoir and rolled near the table with the meats. He went back inside to grab the rest of the provisions.
He wasn't expecting anyone to show up, except, perhaps Shannon and maybe the random neighbor. He didn't care, though, as long as she came. He stopped for a moment and thought about that smile. While inside, he grabbed the lighter fluid and another two pans of meat from the kitchen counter. Lloyd couldn't wait to get his grilling started. He was beginning to salivate a little. "Damn, this is gonna be good." He said to himself. He could already taste the teriyaki marinated meats in his mind. He juggled the pans and the lighter fluid out the door, setting the pans with the rest of the meat and then taking the lighter fluid to the charcoal. Just to be sure, he gave it an extra big squirt. The bottle was already almost finished. There was no way it wouldn't light now. Lloyd pulled a kitchen match from his pocket and struck it using the roughness of the sole of his shoe. He dropped it into the reservoir, resulting in a brilliant poof of fire and smoke. He had to jump back due to the heat. He also checked his face to make sure his eyebrows were still intact. They were there just as before. Lloyd left the grill open so the coals could ash over as needed. They were burning nicely and smelling great.


Lloyd watched the flames flicker and lick the air for a few moments as the coals neared their blanketed state little by little. He was proud of this setup. He was proud of the perfect barbecue he was going to have. He took a few more steps back, closer to the table, to get a better, fuller view of the blaze. And then there was a knock at the door.
It had to be Shannon! Lloyd pivoted slightly towards the door and took a step. Unfortunately, it was onto the lone briquette that had escaped the pyre. He slipped hard and fell backwards onto the table. The meat trays and marinades all spilled over him. The kabobs clattered to the floor of the patio, some landing just right in between the wooden slats to stand on end. Lloyd did his best to get up, but due to the oils in the marinade, he found himself flopping around more than anything. He finally was able to stand. There was another knock at the door. He tried again to make a walk to the patio door, but immediately slipped in place and then stumbled head first into the grill. His head banged hard against the outer shell of the grill and out of instinct, he grabbed on to try to balance himself. His hands immediately began to sizzle and cook. He screamed and pulled away as fast as he could and tumbled backwards, falling in just the right manner for one of the kabobs sticking up to pierce the back of his skull and tear out through his eyeball.
Just then, the front door opened. A beautiful brunette walked through the living room and towards where the commotion was coming from. She opened the patio door to see Lloyd laying, bleeding, and twitching. The fire had just begun to die down on the coals. The table was sitting haphazardly, tumbled across the patio. Most of the meats lay around Lloyd, marinating in blood, gore, and teriyaki. Shannon cooed as she knelt down over Lloyd. "I told you I was a man eater, but I didn't think you'd take it so literally." She said as she plucked the kabob from his eye socket and placed it on the grill. It sizzled as she licked her lips in anticipation.